Ok, all you mothers out there... I know everyone says that parenting is a thankless job that takes years and years to yield results. Well, hey... 3 weeks in, and I gotta say, that part sucks. Excuse my French. What do you all do to stay sane and not take what they're dishing out personally? Even with their limited English, they manage to make things perfectly clear. "Daddy Yes, Mommy NO."
Our friendly neighborhood Ethiopian (Zac) came and visited today, and it was balm for our children's souls. Their attitude was much better after they were able to air their grievances to him in front of us. There was lots of finger pointing by the children at us. At one point I knew that Yordi was telling Zac about how I wouldn't give her water after playing at the park. She was very dramatic. The real story is that she said to me "Water!" much like Henry VIII would have commanded it. I said "Water, please." to indicate to her the tone of voice that would get her water. Then she said "Mommy, mommy, waaaaaaaaateeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer" and threw herself crying on the grass. I told Zac this and he told her she always has to say please, not just to mommy and daddy. Love you, Zac! Zac also brought us injera made by a woman in Elgin. And I finally made a doro wat (chicken stew) that was eaten by Habtamu (Yordi didn't like the injera. What the?!)
Lee wanted me to tell you about Habtamu's new lesson for today. Now, the children call out Mommy, Daddy about a million times a day... all with the same urgency. So, we're not always quick to respond, because they just want you to watch them pee or something... and we feel they can do this themselves. Then there's about every 50th time when they have a legitimate need. Yesterday Yordi was calling and calling me, and I was all "just a minute...mutter...mutter". When I finally went into the bathroom to see what the heck, and she was out of toilet paper. That, to me, is a legitimate need. (Especially since, when we first met, she didn't use TP when she peed.) At any rate... Habtamu was calling from upstairs... whatever... million times a day. Lee finally got up there, and H. had his hand wedged UNDER the bathroom door. We may never know why.
2 comments:
When I ask my 3 yr. old (adopted from Russia)if she likes Mommy she says, "I like Daddy." Grrr. But I recently noticed that when she wakes from a nightmare she calls for Mommy. She's a committed self-soother, so having her let me comfort her is a huge reward for me!
It's hard sometimes. You just let it roll off your shoulders though. Kids are strange, fickle creatures. There have been times in each of my 3 kids lives where they want one parent over the other. Sometimes it hurts the parent being shunned, but you can't let it get to you. I'm glad you had Zac over to talk to the kids. I thought that would help a lot.
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