Is that all you got?

I know that we've brought this up before, but for whatever reason, the "socialization" buzzword tripped my trigger again. I was talking with a friend about the real possibility of the kids going to a formal school next fall and the response was, "Good, then they'll get socialized."

Really?

I tried not to be a jerk, but despite my efforts I responded with something like, "I know! Because we go to this tiny church with no children and the kids play on an adult soccer team, and that's only when we let them out of the basement. I'm really looking forward to them finally being morally guided by children just as confused as they are instead of bugging me all the time."
Was that too snotty?

Seriously, is that all our educational system has going for it? The presence of other children? 12 years of education and all we have to offer the next generation about our experiences is that there were other kids there? That's the kind of thing I tell my children when they start whining about being dragged to some dinner party. Hey, at least there will be other kids there! And I bet there will be ice cream and corn dogs and Legos... but hopefully not together.

Only once in recent history did the topic of school come up and the response was, "Oh, you should try to get your kids enrolled in that new magnet school. The curriculum is going to be tech focused and your son would love it." See the difference? That was actual advice. I already know there's going to be children there so telling me that my kids will get socialized wouldn't help me make any kind of informed choice at all.

I know I'm just going to have to get over this. The "At least they'll get socialized" response is as ingrained into the American psyche as asking "How about that weather?" It's just what people noncommittally fill the verbal void with and everyone falls for it, including a whole lot of teachers. Because, hey, who doesn't want their kid socialized? That's something we can all agree on, right? It's like the lowest common denominator of our educational system. You may not learn anything, but by golly after 10 years of mandated education, you'll be socialized! At this point I'd like to note that gangs and the military also have very rigid social structures. If that's really all I expected my child to learn through adolescence, I suspect either of those routes would be more effective.

So here's what scares me... what if as a society that's really all we get from our years of schooling and this is just our way of collectively admitting it? I'm a firm believer in the old, "It's not what you know, it's who you know" adage. It's been proven over and over to me during my life thus far, so in that sense, yes, knowing the right people at the right time has been far more important to my career path than knowledge. Book smarts can't pitch an idea, or open a door, or point you toward that golden opportunity. Other people do that, and I think as a society we are trying to come to grips with that. How long do you have to be in an educational institution to meet the right people?

I'm not trying to devalue friendships or contacts or whatever we call all the people we communicate with now. I just hope that when my kids look back on their days at school (wherever that may be) they think about how some teacher got them on track for a career they love, or how they overcame their fear of public speaking, or how math or music or English finally 'clicked.' Anything but, "Well son, at least you'll get socialized just like me."

Breakin' It... Old School

The kids have discovered they can check out music CDs from our library.

Things that drive parents crazy...

... and responses from parents already on the edge.


Ok, so we're in church and a man walks up to the microphone with music in his hand.  The pianist starts playing, and Habtamu leans over and asks, "Is that man going to sing?"  You're a better person than I if you haven't just thought of a dozen smart-mouth responses to that.

I ended up whispering back to him, "No.  He's going to yell at you in front of the whole church."  That got a snort from my son.

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Ok, so we're driving along and see some men with a post hole digger, digging a hole.  Yordanos says, "I wonder what they're digging for... you don't see that everyday."  I said, "I'm surprised that dirt isn't frozen."  And she says, "What dirt?"

----------------------------

"Habtamu (or Yordanos), would you please x, y, or z?" 
"Me?"
"Is your name _________? Then, yes, YOU."

OR
"No, your Aunt Tilly!  Yes, YOU..."

-----------------------------

"Have you brushed your teeth?"
[silence while child trying to work around it without lying, because child has gotten in trouble for lying about this subject.]
"Ok, then make sure you do it right now."
"Me?"

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Ok, so, bedtime.  Children are in bed, hugs and kisses received and given.  Question floats down, "Mom?  Which car are you taking tomorrow?"

I suppress the urge to say, "Why, why, WHY?" at increasing volumes.  Instead I say, "The green one."

Child says, "Oh, ok.  Good night, Mom. I love you."

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Ok, so, soccer practice is over and Habtamu runs out and says, "I have to go to the bathroom."  Ok, fine.  Lee and Yordanos wait in the car.  And wait, and wait, and wait, and wait.  And finally, Yordanos asks, "When is he going to come out?"  Lee answers, "When he's done, and hopefully not before."

So an Ethiopian boy walks into a bar...

Habtamu, bless his heart, has the impulse control one typically comes to expect from teenagers, and generally no shortage of poor planning and bad ideas. However, tonight, I got a glimpse that maybe, just maybe, his sense of self-preservation will help him survive long enough to become an adult.

The kids and I were in the car coming home from soccer practice when Yoyo told this "heartwarming" story about a local junior high kid who got expelled for drinking a beer on the way to school. This brought up a lively discussion about why that was such a bad idea, and how his parents must feel, and (the best conversation starter ever) where a child would get such a drink anyway. I should clarify that it's my favorite part because neither child answered, "The back of the fridge after you've gone to bed, duh."

Habtamu knew of a place near the local ice cream shop that he figured had adult drinks in it. And he was absolutely right. The little "store" with the neon signs and two story Pabst Blue Ribbon mural does indeed serve alcohol. So I had to ask, "Do you think they would give you an adult drink if you went in there?" Yoyo said if you kinda covered your face and did something to make yourself taller you could probably get away with it, but Habti would have none of that. He knew there was more to it because there are plenty of short, old people. Eventually the kids came around to how 'your license' must work into the equation.

At which point my son, of his own volition, say to me, "Dad, even if you said it was totally ok and let me do whatever I want like eat candy for breakfast and dinner, I would never take your license plate and use it to get an adult drink."


"Really?" I said, suppressing the image of my son handing a bartender a nice shiny license plate, "I think you mean drivers license. Why would that be a bad idea?"

"Yes the little card. I would never take your drivers license to get adult drinks because I'd get grounded."

"Yes. Yes you would. For how long do you think?" I said deadpan. Again, trying to ride out the conversation knowing that I'll have plenty of time later to enjoy the mental picture of my son trying to pass himself off as a middle aged, white guy, with a vision restriction.

"Umm... Until I'm like... 25 or don't live in the house anymore."

I had to agree, "That sounds about right, but I suggest you don't find out."

You Make the Call!

Time to vote!  Which of these two sounds is the most annoying?

Digging Out

Snowzilla, Snowmaggedon, Blizzard-o-mania... whatever you call it... passed through the other night.  We woke to this Winter Wonderland.

This here is our deck and backyard.  Snow as high as the railing.  Usually, when the weather people say 12-18", they're wrong.  But, huh.

And this is Lee's car. It took a couple of hours to dig out.  It got harder after the snow piles were higher than our heads.  Seemed like you couldn't reach the bottom of the snow.

A Penny Saved is 7 Cents Earned.

How many quarters in a dollar?

12?   [inches in a foot]
5,280?  [feet in a mile]
2,000?  [pounds in a ton]

There are 4 quarters in a dollar.
How much is a quarter worth?

30 cents?

How much is a penny worth?

7?

Change comes in 1 cent, 5 cents, 10 cents, and 25 cents.
How much is a dime worth?

20?

[I think until a certain child thinks money is important, I will keep getting randomly generated answers.]

Antsy Pantsy Dance

There's a couple interesting things about this video. One is Yordi's ability to play soccer without losing the rhythm. The other is the way she takes her brother (in orange) to school while doing so.
Apologies in advance for the video quality. My phone lens was smudged and shoots in SuprCrap on good days anyway... What's not audible is the iPod pumping out vintage Michael Jackson in the background, but you'll get the idea.

Whiny the Clown

After reading about Junie B. Jones dressing up like "Screamy the Clown", Yordanos was inspired to do this:

She called herself "Whiny the Clown" and ran around the house trying to scare us.  Sometimes you just have to shake your head, don't you? 

Out of Phase

I can only assume, by these photos, that my niece is out of phase with the rest of us.  Is she partly in our world, but partly in sub-space?  Is she a baby Nosferatu?  I only notice this phenomenon in pictures... well, that's not strictly true... one minute she'll be there, and you blink, and she's GONE.