9.21.2008

Law Enforcement-Free Sunday

Last week was the 1st week of regular Sunday School. I think Lee covered the SS kick-off week here. Anyway, last week, Habtamu didn't want to go. Huh. No kidding. We pushed him into the room with the other kids and told him to stay in there. We quickly got out of sight and went on to coffee hour. He sat on the floor by the garbage can until the very end of class, when he joined the prayer circle. He came out sullen and angry, but LESS sullen and angry than the week before.

I know, I know, we should attend adult Sunday School while the kids are in SS... but, frankly, we have not got the mental capacity right now. And it's been cool to meet other parents who just want to drink coffee and chat. We've had good conversations about kids and life and God, so it seems like that's where we need to be right now. I'm trying not to be defensive about our choice, because it feels like a big SHOULD to go to a class. And yet, and yet, I have so many SHOULDS on me right now, I REALLY just want to drink coffee and talk to adults! Our church has recognized this need this year and has designated a class room for this purpose. I think it was in response to us (and 2 other couples) who used to go to Starbuck's during SS every week last year. (We had 2 jobs then, and didn't have kids and could afford a million dollars for coffee.)

Anyway, THIS Sunday, we dropped Habtamu off in SS. (Yordanos was already in there, having gone with a friend ahead of us. Right there you can see the difference in personalities.) We left right away for yummy coffee. When we went to pick him up, he was sitting at the table! With other kids! Doing a craft! Apparently, he'd sat CLOSER to the table during class this time and joined them in prayer and for the craft. He was giddy with pride at sitting closer this week, and we praised him up and down for it. He left church HAPPY for the 1st time and wanted to go back to church tomorrow. We told him "there's church on Wednesday if you want to go." We weren't going to push TGIW and overload Habtamu, but he's very excited about going back. Awesome.

We all went home and I made lunch... then I had to go sing with a group from church at a new Methodist church that just got built. We stayed for the very long service and dedication after we sang. I was just glad to not have any demands placed on me for a couple of hours.

We all met up at Pizza Hut, which the kids loved. And they got to ride home in the Bruce & Dan Show bus, with Bruce driving. Since Lee and I had driven separately, neither of us could ride with them. We were explaining this to them, and Habtamu took my arm and gently pushed me off the bus saying "Ok, ok. Go." So, um, yeah, I guess they're adjusting. :)

ALSO, today was the first Sunday that Yordanos was NOT angry at me at church. I got smiles AND affection. I don't know what it was about church that made her mad at me, but I'd get the cold shoulder as soon as we pulled in the parking lot, with lots of glares and shrugs. She would make a point to not sit close enough to me for me to touch her, putting her Bible and crayons pointedly in between us. Today I tickled her neck and she giggled and smiled at me. Whoa. I don't know what happened, but I'm glad for whatever it was. Although, actually, she's been way more affectionate toward me in general. I ALWAYS get hugs and kisses at bedtime now (it used to be hit or miss.) And during the day, she doesn't rebuff me like she used to and will even initiate physical contact.

All in all, I'd have to say that things are coming along nicely. We're settling in as family instead of strangers. We have a deeper level of trust built. I hope I can assume that it will continue to improve... I mean, heck... we still don't know what we're doing as parents... not really... but we're getting better at those moments of clarity... or maybe just better at faking it.

It was a very good day. I guess we won't have much to write about from now on, since things are going so well. Ha ha. Just kidding. :)

7 comments:

jill coen said...

I'm glad ya'll had a nice Sunday and that trust is building.

Now, if things stay all good and boring, please make something up! ;)

Just kidding.

Yarnsmith said...

I'm thinking that life is unpredictable enough that there will ALWAYS be blog fodder available! :)

Karin said...

The first Saturday after our oldest joined our family, my parents took all four of ours for the day since Mike & I were playing in a friend's wedding. Sitting in the back seat of the car T was talking with LB & Keys about life. "Tomorrow's church--we're going to SUNDAY SCHOOL!" they informed him. "I ain't going to no $%&@ Sunday School" was T's response." My mom, sitting in the front seat didn't comment but thought in her head "Oh...I bet you are, sweetie". And, of course, he did. And it worked out (mostly) OK in the long run (although sitting through 'big church' was a challenge for everyone for a looong time). Anyway...love reading the 'church blogs'. And DON'T feel bad about skipping Sunday School for coffee and conversation...I'm betting that's more of a 'should' than you know right now!

Katherine said...

Don't worry so much about 'shoulds' right now. It's ok to go enjoy some coffee and some adult conversation. Oh, and BTW, I still don't know what I'm doing some of the time! 8-)

The McEvil One said...

Maybe Y had such a hard time @ church early on because of teh seriousnes of it...where she has to BE QUIET & SIT STILL for an hour!!!

That's never been an issue for me, cause I'm such a quiet person!!! ;-)

Just glad to hear that the cops didn't have to tazer Lee...

Dustin, Nikki, Madison and Sage said...

Some days all of the 'shoulds' wear on me like a ton of bricks--they feel like a noose around my neck rather that the blessings that they truly are in my life. Some days I want to be a rebel and shirk off everything that I think is expected of me. But those days pass and being a parent brings its set of joys that replace my self-centeredness. I think somewhere I read about dying to self?! ha Some days it is easier to do than others, wouldn't you agree?!. When I realized I wasn't alone and there were actually other moms who felt the same way I did, whew, what a relief that brought! (Your coffee hour sounds wonderful! I wish our church did that!) You are a great mom and you are filling up your kiddos in places they don't realize they are empty. Your love is so sweet to their little spirits and they grow so much in the security of your love, even through the glares and cold shoulders. Hmmm....maybe I should come back and read my own post on some of those more difficult days! lol I hope I don't sound like I am giving advice, because I am certainly not qualified in that area. Just a mom who is looking forward to adopting our own child or children from Ethiopia....then I'll come running to you for advice!

Have a great day!

(BTW, Dustin and I have laughed hysterically over the Business Time video on youtube--where in the world did you find that!)

Yarnsmith said...

Ah, Business Time... who knows where Lee finds these things? Those guys singing have a show on cable tv. We saw it once at my cousin's house. (We don't have cable.) It makes me laugh every time too!