The Gloves Come Off

Today was a really hard day. For the 1st 2 days H&Y were totally compliant and all over us with kisses and hugs... and today, it's as if we (especially me) were covered in boils and sores, and they want nothing more than to defy us. Yes! Welcome to true parenthood. There's just so much going on and everything is different for us and them, and there was the visit to the Kid's Care Orphanage, where the children were originally... and I'm not sure what they understood from that... and then there was the late lunch that took FOREVER... seriously, 2 starving children having to wait an hour for lunch... Ugh.

Also, I had to get antibiotics and anti-nausea meds from the clinic this morning... I'm not up to par. Several others are experiencing similar bouts.

We're used to the pouty lip from Habtamu... if he doesn't get his way, or if there is any perceived slight. Sometimes he bounces right out of it by tickling, other times it goes on for 1/2 hour and ends in him crying, which is the sign that it's almost over. Lee is so great in dealing with that.

Yordanos broke out her defiant, going limp style today. She usually is happy go lucky. She was running off and not staying by me, so I grabbed her and held her... ooooh, she did not like that... she let me put her on my lap on the way home, but wanted no kisses from me.

They both have this shoulder shrug thing that means "NO WAY CRAZY PEOPLE and GET AWAY, but STAY HERE." Ai yi yi.

The other families traveling with us are the BOMB. Awesome. 2 families are looking at extended stays because of paperwork not being right from the USCIS. Please pray for them... they have until tomorrow a.m. to get the right papers so they can fly out Friday.

Anyway, these families are so encouraging, and they all assured me that all parents feel like they don't know what the heck they are doing.

A little about the area... we're staying in the Hilton, which is much like other Hiltons... outside everywhere we go are beggars... most heartbreaking are the mothers with babies and the children who's only English is "Hungry." We were told not to give any money, and that is hard. I had a little boy follow us all the way back to the bus. As I led my currently defiant children past them... it's just so difficult... the problem is too large.

Oh, funny story from yesterday... we did not buy the children shoes because we didn't know the size. We did bring them clothes, and both were thrilled, except H who kept asking about shoes. We had someone explain to them that we'd go tomorrow to buy shoes. We got them and Y said "Thank you Mommy" and H said "Socks?" Doh. So we paid about $11 for 2 pairs of shoes out on the street and $10 for 3 pairs of socks at the Hilton. Sigh.

Really, I cannot stress enough how awesome it is to have Lee's parents here. On the paperwork "party" night, Grandma ran and had copies made several times. They have totally picked up the slack for when we leave stuff behind, and/or don't know where our children are. Ha ha... just kidding, but not really. :)

This parent thing is HARD, but there is joy there, and once we get home and have more control over our situation, it should be better. There's hope, right?

Thanks to you all for your kind comments.

I have not had time to go through pictures yet, so maybe when we get home. In fact, I have barely had the where-with-all to TAKE pictures.



Sounds like you guys are being great parents!! It is so hard on the children knowing that they will soon be leaving their country and all of the familiar surroundings! Having adopted older children ourselves, it sounds like the are adjusting well and are comfortable enough to show you the emotions they are feeling! It really is a good sign!
We will be lifting your family in prayer as you embark on this wonderful journey that God has prepared you for!
Have a great trip home! Can't wait to see pictures of your new family!


small world said...

I agree with Mel's post.While we were still in Russia our 10 year old son began to really act out. It was a great beginning to him adjusting into our family. It seemed a little scary at times but we continued to trust God and he really did integrate nicely. You both are doing awesome.What you are going through IS normal in this process.
AWAA Family

Anonymous said...

Chris and Lee,
You are doing fine, and yes, welcome to parenthood! The kids are probably happy and sad and excited and confused all rolled into one and not sure how to deal with the emotions. Once you are at home and they know they are safe and loved, they will adjust quickly.

Your goodies will be waiting for you upon your return!


Katherine said...

hungry kids are just a meltdown waiting to happen... Believe you me... You'll do fine. It sounds like Habtamu is a lot like my Kai, and Yordanos is a lot like my Noe so far! Best advice is to pray for wisdom... all the time! That's why we named Sophia what we did! I imagine that they are experiencing lots of conflicting emotions all at the same time. We are praying for you daily!

christophertadhankins said...

I'm so glad to finally catch up on all that has happened since you arrived. I can totally sympathize with the parenting struggles, and you both have all the added stress and confusion over adopting older children with a partial language barrier! Sounds like you're doing a fantastic job - the photos of you with H and Y just about had me in tears. I'm so excited that you guys are getting to experience the thrill of children - even with all its ups and downs. I'm sure they will ease into your lives much more once you're back in the states -
Can't wait to meet them both. You'll all be in my prayers...